I two days, I've watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind twice. It's really a very interesting movie. During the first one and a half hours of the show, I couldn't really get what was going on because the movie is shown in fragments similar to that which we saw in the movie Momento. At the early parts of the show, i was lost and fustrated for not understanding a thing. Yet, in the end, i realised how marvelous the editing/cinematography was. The feeling was somewhat like piecing together a jig-saw puzzle and putting small bits together. Then there are times of fustration, when you think you can't find a piece to fit that bloody gap. But in the end, when everything is put together, and we see the final work, the big picture, we know that the time put in was well worth it- even if the puzzle isn't as fantastic looking as it was on the box cover. It is only then, when i realise, patience pays.

I'm not patient person. I do things fast, I hate slow sappy shows (though im beginning to appreciate them), I won't play for a team where there are liabilities, I like listening to music which is fast, I wont wait up for the people who lag behind me and i scold Chris (and pretty much the entire BattleNet community) for being a noob when he plays dota with me just because he doesnt play as well.

I realise, that doing things fast, doesnt mean that you are better, or u can see more or experience more just because you get things done quicker. Sometimes we have to slow down. Instead of speeding down the highway, cruise on it, admire the scenery and take a notice for things which sometimes we dont. How sure are we when someone asks about a traffic light - which colour is on top? Red or Green? Or our watch, which we look at so often. Without looking at it, do we know if there are numbers on its face at each hourly interval? While some people might be confident in their answers, i'm positive a similar question would leave me stumped. Maybe i'm not observant enough? Maybe i don't care? Or maybe I need to slow down a bit more, be more patient, and observe the world-the one which does not revolve around me.

So i ask forgiveness for anything which i've done which was rash and impatient and for missing out on details or feelings along the way.

'Sometimes you have to let go of the accelerator to drive faster,' quoted from Initial D. While all i know how to drive is a tank/m113 at the moment, i'm pretty sure there is some truth to the words said. Anyway, with regard to driving, i'm starting everything next week! Hehehe, i can't wait. While i know im gonna be such a noob, I do hope that my instructor will be, well..... patient :).